A. Living a Christian life is difficult. The reason why is because a sincere believer desires to do all that God desires. A Christian becomes a living sacrifice, giving himself up, so that he can live as God’s ambassador to the world. The more a Christian grows, the deeper his relationship becomes with God. The deeper that relationship becomes, the more the Christians desires to live in obedience to the will of God.
B. As we read the letter of 1 Corinthians, it appears that Paul, a confirmed bachelor, address some questions from the church. So here is a man who has never been married about to teach about marriage. How can that happen? Paul is not giving his opinion, thoughts or feelings. Paul is speaking on behalf of God and guided by the Holy Spirit. This is not marriage lessons from a bachelor, but God view of marriage and how Christians living in a non-Christian world need to understand God’s teaching on this covenant.
C. It is not my goal to single out anyone whose marriage is not “perfect” or to pick on anyone who has been divorced, or is now remarried after a divorce. The elders here believe strongly in teaching the whole counsel of God and have asked me to spend three weeks in this chapter. The goal is to understand the word of God better.
C. Apparently one of the questions the church asked was, "Is remaining unmarried more spiritual than marriage?" Paul replied that it is good for a man or a woman to have the gift of celibacy, but the celibate state is not better than marriage, nor is it the best state for everybody. It is God's will that the marriage union be permanent, a lifetime commitment. There is no place in Christian marriage for a 'trial marriage," nor is there any room for the "escape hatch" attitude: "If the marriage doesn't work, we can always get a divorce.
D. For this reason, marriage must be built on something sturdier than good looks, money, romantic excitement, and social acceptance. There must be Christian commitment, character, and maturity. There must be a willingness to grow, to learn from each other, to forgive and forget, to minister to one another. The kind of love Paul described in 1 Cor 13 is what is needed to cement two lives together. (Points C & D are from The Bible Exposition Commentary)
I. The Purpose of Marriage
A. Let’s start by asking the question, “What is the purpose of marriage?” A Christian can begin in Genesis and realize that in creation, God’s design was for mankind to procreate. Through the marriage of a man and woman God blessed the birth of children. God never had a plan for children to be born out of wedlock. While the sin may happen, the holiness that God gives is that within the bonds of marriage is where children belong. So part of the reason for marriage was to have children, and a person could not do that unless there was an attraction for the opposite sex.
B. The problem came when men and women began to have relations outside of marriage. Paul’s teaching from God is that the sexual desires within us, created within us by God, are to be fulfilled within marriage. As Paul writes, “since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each wife her own husband.”
C. God’s placement of hormones within our bodies is not a temptation for us to do evil, but part of our being that calls us into the oneness of marriage. Listen again to the first 4 verses of this text.
D. The beauty of marriage, and something that must have shocked the world 2000 years ago, is the equality of a husband and wife. So much of the world has devalued women, oppressed them, and treated them as of little significance within society and the family. God comes along, in that culture, and says, a husband’s body does not belong to him and wife’s body does not belong to her. The idea is that they are equal partners in the marriage and belong to one another for God use and fulfillment.
E. I want a better marriage, and part of how that marriage will be better is when I realize that my spouse owns me. I am to give myself to Kerri in such a way that she is please to have me as her husband. When you read Eph. 5 and the relationship between the husband and wife, you see the same teaching. I need to understand that God wants me to desire be passionate towards her alone. We need to give our spouse all that they need. The question we can ask ourselves is, “Do I delight in my spouse more than any other person?” If the answer is no, I need to begin to work on my growth, my maturity, and my attitude in marriage.
F. But there is more to a great marriage than just realizing the equality of the partners the desires of the partners and the placement of sexual fulfillment.
II. Prayer In Marriage
A. Marriage should be covered in prayer. Solomon wrote that a cord of three strands is not easily broken. The third cord in marriage is God. In future weeks we will understand this in greater detail, but to start with, understand that having God in your personal life is necessary to a marriage that pleases Him. Listen to verse 5.
B. Test question, “Do you spend more time panicking or praying about your marriage?” Some people say that their marriage is beyond repair. That statement is not true if both people are Christians. God must become the center of the marriage and greatest support of the marriage. When both partners are believers and spend time in prayer seeking God to use them to bring joy and completeness to their spouse, they will begin to look at their spouse from God’s eyes and not their own. There are times when two Christian people need to spend time alone in prayer and then come back together. God understands that even when are seeking His will, temptation can enter into a marriage. His will is that marriages stay strong and healthy. Therefore, don’t neglect the needs of your spouse in the name of God.
C. I encourage couples to pray out loud together. Prayer is personal, it is from the heart on the one praying. When your spouse hears you pray, he or she hears a part of your heart as you open up to God. It can be a great blessing for married couples to pray out loud together. Together or alone, let prayer cover your marriage. Thank God in prayer for the gift of your spouse. How you view your spouse is how you will treat your spouse. Do you see them as a gift or as curse? Do you pray for them or because of them? No matter what that marriage is like, if you both seek God, you will both seek to help and aid one another. You will cherish each other.
III. Marriage is for Life
A. 1 Cor. 7:8-11. Paul brings the sexual union into the confines of marriage. But he also wants them to realize that he is not saying that if a person thinks someone else looks good to them that they should just dump their spouse and go marry the next partner. That is simply trying to rationalize sinful behavior. God has one goal for marriage: One man, One woman, for life. That’s it. God is not seeking to separate marriage, he is not wanting people find a good way out or divorce. He wants a marriage to work through the difficult times because both partners love God.
B. When you jump to the end of this passage we read about what happens when death does end a marriage. Look at verse 39-40. In this section our elders realize that a widow has every right within God’s laws of marriage to be in a covenant relationship, but she must marry a Christian. Think about the value of this teaching. A person has been married and undergone the hardship of the death of a spouse, now, that person looks to the remainder of the life and personally does not want to be alone. Paul says there is nothing wrong that. The only restriction he places is that the person marries a Christian.
C. Our goal is to get to heaven. There is no deeper covenant relationship we have on earth than the covenant of marriage. Is there a reason any person would desire to enter into a marriage knowing that the religious views of the prospective spouse is contrary to the understanding they have? As a widow, marrying for a second time, she or he needs to keep their spiritual life a priority which means to marry a fellow Christian. While it is taught for the widow, it makes a great precedent for all who enter into marriage.
Conclusion:
A. Jesus was questioned about divorce, but he brought the people back to God. His conclusion stated in Matt. 19 is that, “What God has joined together, let no man separate.” Marriage is beautiful in the eyes of the Lord. Each partner in the marriage needs to remember that their spouse is a gift and to view themselves as belonging to the other. Each partner should spend time in prayer for their marriage, seeking God to enter into their lives drawing them closer together. And each partner must understand that the commitment that is made in marriage is a life-long commitment. The goal is for both to get to heaven. A Christian spouse can be one the best gifts God gives you in helping you to walk in the pathways of righteousness.
B. Commit this day to give your marriage to God and to give yourself over to your spouse. If you have hurt your marriage, apologize, seek to show fruit of repentance and spent time in prayer. Let close with a prayer for all the marriages within this congregation.
C. The church is the bride of Christ. When we become a Christian we enter into a “marriage” bond with Christ. If you have never given yourself to Jesus, then let today be the day you commit your life to him. If we can pray for you or help you in some spiritual manner, please come as we stand and sing.
